Try Not to Giggle….

Around 5 months ago, I had to read my first sex scene aloud. I am pretty choosy about the projects I pick, after all, they will be out there FOREVER. But, most popular fiction books have some sort of sex scene and some are pretty racy.

I am not what you call an “intellectual reader”. Now, I have nothing against the classics, I loved Little Women, Mark Twain, etc…but I read for the enjoyment of the story. If the story is good and written well, I read it. I have thousands of books in my library, from everything Stephen King wrote to The Secret Garden and The Joy Luck Club. Everyone has their own taste, but mine is like ordering every single one of the 31 flavors and I love them all! I don’t care for self help books or career building books, but give me a good Apocalypse story or a sexy vampire slayer heroine and I am in!

Okay, back to the sex scene…the reason I said all that in the last paragraph is because simply, I choose books to narrate that I would purchase myself. Again, everyone is different, so choose what YOU like to read. Trust me, those are so much more fun to read aloud. Anyways….this particular book was amazing. It had everything I like in a good story. Kick ass female lead, lots of action, sarcasm, humor, etc. And then, two thirds into the book, it happens. That one chapter that starts with….”He pulled me in close and put his hand on my…..” Oh Lord, how am I gonna do this? My grandchildren might hear this someday!

So, I start reading. The first time I had to make a “moaning” sound, I felt like that fat middle age lady with the 1-900 number that you men always call and think you are talking to some 20 year old blonde model. You know what I mean? I couldn’t help it. My cursed imagination took over and I started giggling. I couldn’t stop. I tried blustering out the word “nipple” and it sounded like “neeple”. Well, that got me going all over again…Hola senora, may I touch your neeple? I finally stopped hiccupping, and got down to business again. “He pulled her against his strong body and she could feel that he was ready for her…” Oh my God. Can I skip this Chapter?

The answer is no. I committed to this book and by God, I will finish it. By the way, it’s doing very well and the whole project turned out to be an awesome, fun read.

The point is, choose your projects wisely. I naively did some books in the beginning that I SO regret reading. But guess what, they are out there forever, and there is nothing I can do about it. And remember, when you come across that first sex scene…try not to giggle!

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